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Ang Alamat ng Chorvaloo

14 January 2010 12 Comments

thinking_monkeyAlam kong madalas niyong mabasa ang katagang “chorvaloo” dito sa Barrio at malimit niyo rin itong marinig mula sa bunganga ng aming sangkapatiran pati na rin sa mga babae (at lalake?) na feeling miyembro na rin ng aming federacion.
Kung interesado kayong malaman ang history ng napaka-influential na salitang ito, continue reading this post.
Kung hindi niyo naman feel na malaman kung bakit may ganitong salita, ay huwag niyo nang ipagpatuloy ang pagbabasa at baka ito pa ang maging dahilan ng high blood niyo. Charing!

Disclaimer: Ang sumusunod na mga talata ay base lamang sa pansariling experience at opinion ng manunulat. Huwag masyadong paniwalaan. Huwag seryosohin at ito’y isang napakalaking char lang. Hahaha!

“Chorvaloo”. [chor-vah-loo]. Noun, Pronoun, Adjective, Verb, Adverb.

Saan nga ba nanggaling ang salitang ito?
(Aba malay ko noh.)
Isa ‘yang malaking tanong na hindi ko rin masagot ng buong puso at buong apdo.
Hindi rin naman ito tulad ng isang kabute (na tulad ni benign0) na bigla na lang sumulpot sa buong language world. Alam ko at alam niyo na may pinanggalingan talaga ito.
Ano ba ang meaning ng salitang “chorvaloo?”
Well, maraming puedeng meaning ang salitang ito. According to my sisterettes, there are approximately 48,000 definitions and interpretations that can be associated with the word itself.
Okay etchos lang. Hahaha!
There are other schools of knowledge (read: gag shows and tv sitcoms) who have expressed their theories of the word “chorvaloo”. According to one of them, nagsimula daw ito nang isang grupo ng mga bading ang naglakag-lakad upang mag-hunting ng makakain (hindi boys ang hina-hunting nila ha), at nang biglang dumaan ang Halley’s comet. Nagulat ang isang bading kaya bigla itong napasigaw, subali’t hindi niya alam kung ano ang nakita niya kaya tinuro niya ito sa kanyang mga sisterettes.

“Ano yun?”, tanong ng isa.
“Aba ewan ko.”, sagot naman ng isa.
“Hmmm… I think isa ‘yang “chorvaloo.”, wika naman ng pinakamatanda sa kanila.

At yun na nga daw ang naging pinagmulan ng salitang “chorvaloo” according to the said theory.
Unfortunately, hindi ito accurate and was ruled out by the NASA.
Actually, medyo may sense talaga ang theory na ito dahil may natagpuang ancient drawings sa isang kuweba sa Lascaux, France kung saan nakalarawan ang apat na bading na tinuturo ang isang kometa sa langit. Sa kaliwang bahagi ng drawing ay nakasulat ang salitang “churva” which according to the discoverers ay malamang dito nanggaling ang salitang “chorvaloo”. Kung bakit ni-rule out ang teoriyang ito ay sa kadahilanang Pentel Pen pala ang ginamit sa pagsulat at yung salitang nakasulat ay may erasure. Hindi pala ito “churva” kundi “Chuva Chienes”.
FRANCE CAVE DRAWINGS
Si Ate Chuva pala ang gumuhit ng naturang drawing nung magbakasyon siya kasama si La Kapitana sa France. I-zoom niyo ang picture nang makita niyo. (Note: Huwag magpa-uto. Hahaha!)

There’s also another scientific discovery to further prove the historical significance of “chorvaloo” nang matagpuan kasama ng terra cotta warriors sa China ang isang sundalo na hindi nakasuot ng fighting gear tulad ng majority of the sculptures.
terra-cotta-warriors
Sa halip ay suot ito ang isang t-shirt na nakasulat ang salitang “chorvaloo” sa dibdib nito. Siyempre, ni-ruleout ulit ang teoriyang galing sa mga Chinese ang salitang “chorvaloo” dahil napag-alaman na may etiketa pala ang suot na t-shirt ng naturang warrior at nakasulat sa etiketa ang
“Made in the Philippines”.
Samakatuwid, ang salitang “chorvaloo” ay galing pala sa ating bansa.
Marami pang theories ang lumabas, tulad na lang ng “The Big Bang and Cloud 9 Theory” at ang “Theory of Unnatural Selection” na popularized by scientist Charlene “Charing” Darwin but all of them do not deliver a direct explanation.
Fortunately, due to the public’s clamor for a real explanation, contemporary theories are now being considered. The theories mentioned above are not that accurate due to lack of content and further evidence to prove it.
According to a language historian (read: ang kapitbahay naming etchosera), the word “chorvaloo” is derived from the word “chorva”, na nanggaling sa salitang “chuva” na ginawang “chuva choo-choo” ni Jolina, na naging “chuva chienes” na naging “chuvaness” which means,

“Wala lang”.

According to another language historian (read: ang kapitbahay kong sisterette sa bukid), ang salitang “chorvaloo” is actually derived from the word “char” popularised in the southern part of the Philippines, na naging “charing” na naging “char char lang” na naging “charing lang” na naging “charmeuse” na naging “charity” na naging “Charito Solis” (RIP) and eventually naging “Charlene Bonnin-Gonzalez”, which means,

“Joke only”.

To make the story short, hindi talaga natin alam ang pinagmulan ng salitang “chorvaloo”. Lahat ng explanation na nabasa niyo sa itaas ay malamang tama o mali pero mas malaki ang percentage na mali talaga ito. Hahaha!
The most accurate definition that has been used for the past 48,000 years is this:
If you can’t express and say a certain word because nakalimutan mo or medyo awkward ka, or dahil sa napakasimpleng dahilan at may gusto kang i-express na hindi mo ma-express because of unexplainable circumstances, you can use the word “chorvaloo”.
Example:
English: You know, I have been to New York City and we went to this posh restaurant located in the chorvaloo section of the meat packing district.
Tagalog: Hoy bakla, alam mo nakausap ko kanina yung crush ko. Tuwang tuwa talaga ako para akong nasa chorvaloo.
Mandarin: Ni wen wo ai ni you duo shen chorvaloo, wo ai ni you ji fen.
French: Bon jour. Je’t adore chorvaloo.

Hahaha!

Kung may alam or may version kayo ng alamat ng “chorvaloo”, maaari niyo rin itong ibahagi sa amin dito sa Barrio at kapag nagustuhan namin ang teoriya ninyo ay makakatanggap kayo ng reward.
Isang plake kung saan nakasulat ang iyong pangalan kasama ang katagang,

“ISA AKONG CHORVALOO.”

Thank you.
At diyan nagtatapos ang alamat ng “chorvaloo”.
Sana may napulot kayong aral.

photo of Lascaux drawings: The Huffington Post
photo of Terra Cotta warriors: National Geographic

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12 Comments »

  • BURAOT says:

    wehehe. churvaloo chorvalais.

  • reynz says:

    i was home several years ago at yong mga batang naglalaro i heard them counting kemerloo and chorvaloo tawa ako nang tawa kahit i had no clue kung ano ang ibig sabihin nila

  • Chi says:

    hehehe… churvaloo? tunog loo? di kaya kubeta yan? hahaha.
    @reynz, i found this from filipino gay lingo site, eto ba kinakanta ng mga bata? :-D
    Song Title: Bubuka Ang Bulaklak ~ Group of kids forming a circle that opens and close like a flower, then one person (the “queen”) would go in the circle would dance to the tune of boom tiyaya

    Bubukesh and floweret ~ Bubuka ang bulaklak (the flower will open)
    Jojosok ang reynabelz ~ Papasok ang reyna (the queen will enter)
    Shochurva ang chacha ~ Sasayaw ng chacha (she willl dance chacha)
    Pa jempot jempot fah ~ Pa kembot kembot pa (with swinging hips)
    Boom tiyayavush chenes ~ Boom ti yah yah

    Song Title: Pen Pen de Sarapen ~ Rhyming chant like eenie meenie miney mo
    Pen pen de chorvaloo ~ Pen pen de sarapen
    De kemerloo de eklavoo ~ De kutsilyo, de almasen (kutsilyo=knife, almasen=warehouse)
    Hao hao de chenelyn de big yuten ~ Haw, haw de karabaw de batuten (karabaw=water buffalo, batuten=stinky)
    Sfriti dapat iipit ~ Sipit namimilipit (claws that pinch)
    Goldness filak chumochorva ~ Ginto`t pilak namumulaklak (gold and silver flourishing)
    Sa tabi ng chenes ~ Sa tabi ng dagat (next to the sea)
    Shoyang fula, talong na fula ~ Sayang pula, tatlong pera (red skirt, three pesos)
    Shoyang fute, talong na mafute ~ Sayang puti, tatlong salapi (white skirt, three pesos)
    Chuk chak chenes, namo uz ek ~ Sawsaw sa suka, mahuli ay taya (dip in vinegar, last is out)

    hahaha galing ng interpretation no?

  • pehpot says:

    na chervaloo ako habang binabasa ito, ang dami ko natutunan haha
    Evolution of gay lingo is so fun and entertaining hehe

  • [...] chak chenes! At dahil sa alamat ng chovaloo, nahawa ako. hahaha. eto mga sisterettes ang na find ko. i learned a lot from this and still [...]

  • Mel says:

    in fairness ha, nahirapan akong chorvahin ang post na ito. mahirap chumorva ng mga ka-chorvahan dahil kelangan pa talaga ng maraming chorvaloo at chenelyn para lamang lumabas na chorva ang chorvaling na ito. yun na.

    • Snow says:

      Sabi nila ang root word daw ng chorvaloo ay yung chuva-chuva something na pinauso ni jolina magdangal noon.

      whatever…i love the lingo! ~_~

  • Silver says:

    At anong kaguluhang chorvalais na ito?? Witz aketch magetch???

    Hahhahahha.

  • [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Silver, Snow. Snow said: RT @tweetmeme Ang Alamat ng Chorvaloo http://is.gd/6ciPU [...]

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