I thought it was  going to be another one of those ordinary days. The Autumn season was slowly showing it’s pretty reds, oranges and faded greens and my window pane next to the study  had a rhythmic beat from the steady Fall drizzle. As my children nestled on the corner of the couch, hypnotized by the faint drumbeats produced by Dora, I went about with my daily news reading with a few clicks of my reliable mouse.
Splashed across CNN’s website was a young man who I thought looked Filipino.  A …

Photo credits here.
One Sunday afternoon.
Naglagalig ako sa mansion ni Arianna Huffington.
Nakita kong may kumusyon sa Google.
Binuksan si linkeedoo.
At eto ang lumabas: GOOGLE BRAIN DRAIN.
Nag-alala ako. Tinawag si Mamang Kartero at nagpadala ng telegrama sa Reyna. Baka maapektuhan ang Barrio Siete dahil alam kong anak ng Google si Reyna. Billion ang stocks namen sa Google. Billion sa aking panaginip. (Masama bang mangarap aber?!)
Pagkabalik ni Mamang Kartero, heto ang kwento ng telegrama ni Reyna.
Telegrama ni Reyna:
I was laughing at Silver.
She sent me a link.
From the Huffington Post.
I clicked and it said: The …

Oo, ina-atake na naman ata ako nang mid-life crisis sa edad na trenta y doz dahil malapit na naman ata akong mag-adios patria adorada sa pabrika. I’m not looking for somebody na gawin ang ginawa ko lasyir noh? Hahaha! Sabi nga, “Don’t try this at home!” Pero, if you are in some funky situation sa trabaho na iritang irita ka na to the maximum leveleyshus, wez, maybe these 10 questions will help you find out whether it’s time to buy some gas and hit the road. Sabayan nyo ako! Hahaha!
Lahat …

Photo Nadekwat: Dito
Hindi totoo ang balita that I had breast augmentation. Ibang augmentation ang gusto ko.
Eto nga. I got out of the hospital then, after what was supposed to be just 2 weeks stay after a laparascopic surgery operation, that ended with an additional 2 weeks, because I was hard-headed. The doctor said, “go on with your normal life!“, and so I hit the bars and started drinking. Bummer! That was not the normal life daw that my doctor was talking about dahil me sugat pa nga sa loob …

This is a true story of how I ran across the best boss in the world.
Haddonfield, New Jersey
I used to work in Haddonfield, New Jersey. My boss? Nasty bitch, foul mouthed and hated white people. Working as Controller, I had a staff. Napakatamad, bastos at maldita. I can’t do much. Ka-chika nang impaktita si maldita. I didn’t like the partnership they had dahil it was unprofessional and it was then that I wished i had another job.
Business divested: Unemployed
Months passed, anak nang leche oo! I was only joking, aba! Pucha! …

… yan ang nakasulat!
Ewan kung saan…baka kayo alam nyo?
Sabi doon sa movie na Maid in Manhattan:
“When God closes the door, He opens a window. So…jump!!“
Feel na feel ko ang mga katagang iyan sa panahong ito. Hinahanap at iniintay ko pa yung window kung saan puede akong tumalon…(not literally of course, hindi naman ako suicidal)…you know what I mean.
Ngayong umaga lang…merong nagsarang pintuan sa harapan ko. Hindi naman ito first time na nangyari sa akin. Pero hindi pa rin ako nasanay. Nalulungkot pa rin ako pag ganyan ang nangyari.
May mga bagay …

Once you work sa pier, tiga-salansan nang mga barko
Shit happens.
At parang lighting speed na alam sa pabrika.
Alam mo yon, di ba?! Andaming chizmozaaaaa!!!
Minsan, babaklasin mo ang barko.
Para buuin uli.
And when you’re done
Merong emergency
Nakalimutan ang pako
Nakakalukring di ba?
Leche! Ang hirap maging corporate alipin!
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When I was a little gurl growing up in Barrio Siete, I was not aware that my behaviour is different from the regular kids. Only then when I started going to school that I noticed  my actions and preferences were similar to those of the girls most of the time, compared to the normal boys.
Tuwing may recitation sa English at tinatanong kami ng aming teacher kung ano ang gusto namin paglaki , madalas ang sagot ay maging doctor, teacher, police, nurse, lawyer, singer at iba pa. At palaging kasunod nito …

I was talking to one of my boylets in Tiwi, Albay the other day. He gave me the news. My other boylet na binilhan ko nang pridyidir is now an OFW in Dubai. Huh?! Eh dahil kilala ko yong nangutong saken… “Tatagal ba yun dun?!” sabi ko. Eh kasi nga, first it was Kotsengkuba who told me he’s had it and decided to go home after working for so many years in China. Then, it was my nephew who said, he is so tired with his Arab employer in Saudi. …

And so, classes in most Barrio Siete and Sitis in the Philippines have opened. At bawat opening, me closing. Eto ngayon ang chorva. Life after college can be very difficult for students everywhere. You may be living in turd or pers world kawntri noh! Pero parang mas mahirap ata kung asa turd world leche land ka deba? Anjan na yong there’ll be tons and thousands of graduates like yourself but there are only “limited employment opportunities” to fill in. *Arayat* Por ejemplo, ang aking brother ay 4 years ng graduate …

ANG CREDENTIALS, BOW
NAKAKABALIW, NAKAKAALIW
NAKAKATAKA, NAKAKASUKA
NAKAKAGULO, NAKAKABOBO
NAKAKALOKO,NAKAKAUTO
NAKAKAGALIT, NAKAKAINIS
NAKAKAPIKON,NAKAKASIPON
NAKAKASAYA, NAKAKANTA
NAKAKATAKOT, pakalmot nga!
Nang magkaroon ng Giyera Mundial sa buladasphere tungkol sa credentials, marami ang nag-akala na ito ay isa lamang papel na tinatawag na diploma. Diyan kayo nagkakamali. Maling-mali Birhinya dahil isa lamang yon sa mga credentials. Sandali. (suklay muna sa buhok). Bagong gising lang kasi ako nang kalamapagin ako ng reyna para sumulat tungkol sa credentials. With S. Translation. May karapatan.
Ang credential ay pagpatunay kung ano ang ating gawain na binalik-balikan natin kahit tayo ay gusto nang magwala sa opisina dahil ang …