Kris Aquino’s Online Despedida Party
Sa kadahilanang bumigkas nang salita ang Kristita tungkol doon sa fake psycho report nang ABS-CBN kung saan sinabi nyang: “Gusto ko silang saksakin!“, aba’y seryosohin ba nang mga ilang anti-Noynoy fanatics. Totoo bang mag-tatayo si Kris nang private army para habulin si Maria Ressa dahil binigyan nang ABS CBN ang pekeng report nang air-time? Hindi. Heto kasing mga anti-Noynoy fanatics, ultimo satiriko pinaniniwalaan kada punto.
Kaya heto ngayon sa Facebook hindi pa man nasusunog, pero umiinit na sya. Mayron na kasing Kris Aquino’s Online Despedida Party sa Facebook. Mga kagagawan nang mga BITTER OCAMPO!!!
Sabi kasi ni Kris: “If [Noynoy] does win and I’m a cause of stress for him and his presidency, I’ll gladly take my two boys and live anywhere there is TFC (ABS-CBN’s The Filipino Channel) overseas.”
The remark was snapped up on all media platforms, with relish. Now, Netizens are collecting on the IOU, demonstrating the many other ways they can say, “Pack your bags!”
One writes, wistfully: “My dearest Kris, it’s only six years anyway. Do as your mom Cory did: Make the ultimate sacrifice for the country.”
Another isn’t as gentle: “The next Edsa revolution will be to oust Aquino … Kris Aquino.”
Yet another theorizes: “Millions voted for Noynoy because they want to see Kris go.”
Laugh out loud
These are among the more sober posts; other comments are laced with vitriol or punctuated with “LOL” (“laugh out loud”) and “LMAO” (“laughing my a– off”):
“She’s never leaving.”
“She’ll just turn around, toss her hair and say, ‘I lied.’”
“Don’t forget James!”
“May I suggest North Korea?”
So where’s the party? Wherever Kris wants, however she wants it.
“Choose the motif!”
“I’ll bring the cake.”
“Lechon Cebu from me!”
What’s a girl to do?
Gone, for now
The Inquirer couldn’t reach Kris for comment. Has she, in fact, gone? Yes, her friend and fellow TV host Boy Abunda said, but hold the champagne, “Despedida” members, she’s just somewhere out of town, “taking a post-election break.”
In Kris’ stead, the Inquirer found the next best things, two of her most famous clones—Jon Santos’ “Kreezie” and Frida Nepomuceno’s “Kris A.”
“Kreezie” stands by her word, convinced she can “still be of service to the Filipino people even if I am seen only on TFC.” And anyway, she said, it’s time she went international. “A lot of Hollywood stars supported my brother ‘Nyoy,’ like the entire cast of ‘Glee,’ who kept brandishing the L sign.” (Except that, on the popular US musical series, “L” stands for “loser.”)
Red carpet
dreams“Kreezie” is looking forward to walking the red carpets in Hollywood. “But only those shades of red that compliment my skin tone, like ‘Mano Po’ red. Or maybe they can start laying out yellow carpets.”
She also sees herself anchoring an entertainment show
, a la Ryan Seacrest or Oprah Winfrey. “I could team up with Oprah in a show that might be titled ‘OK: Oprah and Kris.’ Or, better yet, ‘KO.’”“Kris A” is certain her fans won’t allow her to leave, ever. “I know that people can’t get enough of me, so I’ve decided to stay and help my brother, the President.”
She could take a government position, she said: “I could be Noy’s Defense secretary since I’m the one who’s always defending him naman.”
Just jealous
Of course Kris A is upset about “Kris Aquino Despedida.” All those people are just jealous, she said.
But should TFC give her a show elsewhere, well, she’s absolutely ready for world domination. “It’s about time Oprah retired, and I can replace her,” she said. “I could call my global show ‘Kris Is.’”
Source: Inquirer
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barrio_ninja is Barrio Ninja is the founding and only member of Barrio Siete's Defense Task Force called Siete Homeland Intelligence Team (SHIT). When Barrio Ninja's mentor was attacked by online infidels snorting talcum powders, he dedicated his entire blogging life honing his skill, which is to cook pork and beans. Now, he hunts down liars, bogus blogs, bogus media people and PR infidels.
NAKNAMPUSA! hoy! isa ako sa nag-like nung page, pero it does not mean na agree ako dun sa gumawa nang Facebook page.
yan.
qualification lang hehe!
hindi lang po si maria ressa, pati na lahat nang TOPAK at ang boylet mong si Gilbert Remulla ay sasaksakin ni Kris
kung ayaw nilang lumabas ang mga palikpik ko, pwes, yan ang wag na wag nilang gagawin ki Gilbert Tonya hehehe
kamahalan kamahalan (hingal)
kanina kapa pinapahanap ni chonching,my
chismis my chismes eto nyahahaha.
awatin mo raw si noynoy mo hahaha
http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/breakingnews/nation/view/20100514-269967/Aquino-Why-should-Kris-leave-the-country
Kawawang Kris Aquino…laging target ng mga detractors ni Noynoy….tsk…tsk…tsk…
hahaha, snow, don’t worry, mainit na hangin lang na humuhip ke kris yan. she’s got a lot of airconditioner. kung wala kahit ako magpaypay sa kanya. hihihi. i love kris. kahit tuwang-asar ako sa labsak ng salita nya. hihihi.
Sa galing ni Kris she can do anything. I suggest she bone up on politics and also economics and public policies so she can prepare herself for a political career. If she has half her mom’s saintly qualities and being a very charismatic personality on her own, how far could she go. We Filipinos should see smartness and potential when it is staring at us in our faces and not be sidelined by lapses or human frailty.
AY! agree ako dyan Rosa! As Bicolano, pasado si Kris as one Uragon. Pwedeng-pwedeng politico yan!
Kris won’t waste her time on this ‘joke’. She’ll just release her signature laugh on them.
Hahahaha
Mamatay sila sa inis.
Si WILLIE meron ding despidida party hahaha!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Willie-Reviliames-Despedida/121645551193137?v=wall
Si Wowowelleh overdue na ang exit sa eksena.
Si Kris hindi pa, ano ba pinakita ni Kris na labag sa pangako nya, ala pa…yet. So kayong mga stirrer ng kape, manahimik.
Not that I’m pro Kris, don’t forget sana her DNA too is composed of what you don’t have mga impakto kayong kampon ni bansot.
Hate her if you will but what she got, you don’t…inggit kayo?
Pasensya. Yon pede nyong bilhin sa panaderya!
kris said ““If [Noynoy] does win and I’m a cause of stress for him and his presidency”
Did Kris do anything to cause stress for Noy and his presidency?
Nope. It wasn’t her.Yong mga nanggagalaiti lang sa inggit sa kanya ang gumagawa ng kalokohan diba para maging “cause of stress sya”
if i were kris, i’m gonna toss my hair, wink and give my swetest smile/laugh just to annoy them. hahaha.
anu sila hilo? anu na ang syowbiz pag nawala si kris?jejeje
boring na talaga pag sya pa nawala, i love kris, pagsasampalin mo nga sila ng mga fresh scandals para maloka na sila ng tuluyan at sila ang magdispidida ng kusa sa sarili nila sa inis hahahahaha
masyado naman eksayted ang mga bitter-melon na inggitera pa. conditional ang pag-alis ni kris. hindi pa naman sya burden kay noynoy, so bakit sya aalis?
Like ko lang mawitness ang bongacious yellow gown ni Ms. Kris para sa dispidida, if ever; NOW NA! hah hah hah hah, divah Kuhyah Boy?